Ubisoft are Officially Jerks Now

February 9th, 2013 by


Imagine you had a friend whose family made some pretty good… pants.  They made one of your favourite pairs of pants that you wore a lot and then he told you they were updating the style and comfort of the pants design, but you’d only be able to buy them from a members-only store that you were probably going to join anyways.  You wait in line to buy your membership to the store and are generally enjoying the other clothing it offers, but you wonder where the new pants you were promised are.  You ask your friend what happened and he apologizes saying the pants weren’t perfect enough for the store’s launch and that they’ll be ready for sure in a couple of months.  To tide you over, he lets you try the current model of the pants on and they’re just as good as you imagined so you figure you can wait. 

Two weeks before you’ll finally be able to get your hands on those great new pants, which you know are already complete, just waiting to be made and put out on the shelves, he tells you that they’ve been delayed again.  Incredulous as you are you ask how much longer you could possibly have to wait for these already finished pants and he says about another 7 months, making it almost a year from when you were originally promised to be able to get your pants.  When you ask why, he says that he’s going to be selling his pants at a couple of big box stores as well now, so you’ll have to wait to buy your pants at the members-only store until he can finish branding his pants for those stores too.  When you remind him of the promise he had already broken once regarding the pants’ release date, he originally says “Tough.”, but then when he sees just how upset you are and that you’re not shutting up, he offers you an exclusive extra opportunity to try on the pants once more before you wait another few months.  “Maybe I’ll let you put your hands in the velvety pockets this time”, he says. 

You know what your friend constantly breaking his promises would be in this case?  A jerk, and not much of a “friend” either.  This allegory shows us just how much of jerks Ubisoft are being with their recent blatant platitudes for the Wii U community by offering us another demo of the game instead of the game itself that we were already promised would be available at launch, and then again at the end of this month.  I, for one, didn’t buy the New Super Mario Bros. game at launch because I was sure all of my platforming needs would be served by the shiny Rayman Legends that I got to play at E3 and again when its first demo came out. 

Ubisoft are no longer even trying to hold the appearance of a caring or responsive company, so I for one am not going to waste any more effort on them.  If they can’t already see what supreme, money-grubbing jerks they’re being, and how it is not acceptable to play petty mind games with the audience you rely upon for your income, then I’m going to show them the only way they seem to understand — with my wallet and power as a consumer.

I encourage all Wii U owners being jerked around by the uncaring and obviously poorly managed Ubisoft to not download this pathetic second Rayman Legends demo, should it ever come out, and definitely not buy the game if it happens to not come out until September either (especially not the 360/PS3 versions that arguably caused this situation).  It’s a shame that the work of a dedicated and obviously talented development team may go to waste, but Ubisoft’s horrific business practices cannot be encouraged if we hope to maintain any shred of dignity as the gaming public in general.  If Ubisoft Montpellier wants to break away from its controlling and deranged parent company and perhaps crowd-fund a new game, I would gladly financially stand beside them and the quality of their work when it is not drowning in the unscrupulous mire of corporate fatuity.  At least I know the “pants” will be comfortable and readily available if they’re not being sold by such jerks.